he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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