UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
