just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
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