I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I seem to have left my pride at pride
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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