I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
