Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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