he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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