Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Randomize
