would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
