Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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