My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize