who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
