I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
im holly from the hills drunk
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
