There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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