If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
