Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
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my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
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He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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