Grow some girl-balls and come out already
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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