hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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