like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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