We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
