Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
