the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
