The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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