the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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