I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
