You smell like stripper and shame
you would pick up someone in the library
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.