I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Can you bring me the toilet please
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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