Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
