Where is the hickey?
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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