But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.