he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
