exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
