it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
How naked do you want me to be?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
