I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
