# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
