Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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