We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Operation Purity has been aborted
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
