The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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