Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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