i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
