Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
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