It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Randomize
