Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize