they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize