so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
