how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
