can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
