it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
