Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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