They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize