I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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