U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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